The Way Rei Thinks
by GrowPulter
Summary: this is her thought beyond her heart. she lived her life as the NERV's eva pilot to fight the angels, and as adam's kid. Will she follow her creator's command? Or she will back to her father's hug?


The way Rei Thinks

This is how Rei thinks about people around her. Even a very quiet girl like her thinks a lot.

About Ikari Shinji :

Shinji, you're a good kid. Don't waste your time with trying to make your father happy. What you have to know is, your father has his own style to what he called happy. Not always with smile or laugh. Someday, you'll know that. And, actually, you don't have to miss your mother, as long as you still in the NERV. You got to believe me that your mother always sees you. Even she could ask you to your father. You're such a lucky person, Shinji. And thanks for trying to be a good friend for me. But, still, I'm on my road. I'm set to walk alone until I reach the end of life road. I do really appreciate and deep inside my heart, I'm happy to know someone kind like you. You don't have to prove anything more. I trust you, Shinji. I could see someday you'll be a happy fellow. And don't think too much about our moments. It seems that we will never be together, but it's okay. You got the better one than me, I'm not enough for the son of evangelion founder.

About Nagisa Kaworu ;

The first I wanna you to know is, we're not same. We're resemble, but different each other. We work for different side. Kaworu, I know you're smart and kind. Sometimes it feels, I'm gonna be happy if I get along with you. But, at the moment, I realize too that it's called betrayal, to be with you forever. I could feel the peace be with you. Maybe because we're similar in a same thing. I've seen Shinji's development lately. That's because of you. You could make him happier than before. Even if it's forbidden, deep inside my heart, I'm happy for your arrival here. Even if I know that you came to destroy us, but being with someone like you is nice. I hope we could enjoy our time together. And hope we can meet in the next life. P.S. : make the third impact good……

About Soryuu Asuka Langley :

Asuka, you're a nice girl. I understand the dark background behind you. I understand about the weakness that you want to cover with your behavior. I understand about your pain. We're similar, even if I know that you will ignore that surely. But, I'm proud of you. You can struggle well. That's my girl. Sometimes I don't like you very much. Maybe, it's because my silence had been disturbed by you. But it doesn't mean I hate you. You have slapped me once. In the elevator, I still remember. You said I always give up to the destiny, without any effort. And you said I'm not worth it to be Commander Ikari's golden kid. Maybe you're right. But, I don't have strength like you to face the destiny, don't have brave heart to change my destiny, and don't have good luck like yours to be free from my past. Asuka, keep strong like this. The past won't do anything to you. The same sentence that I have to tell myself too…..

About Katsuragi Misato

Misato, you're a good war planer and babysitter. Ha, that's funny to see that you're care to us, and also plan for the next war. Misato, sometimes there's a scar that can't be cured. If you have something like that, leave it. Don't try to cure it. You're a nice person. Your attitude, looks like you blame Kaji. But, I know you don't. So, let Kaji comes to your life. Chance never comes twice. Sometimes you try to understand me. But it won't work, Misato. Like I said to Shinji, I'm set to live alone. To sail alone in the life ocean. But it's okay, that would make me as a though sailor. But you, I don't see that you have to sail your ocean alone. Sail it with Kaji, before it's too late. You could change everything, but you're too shy to do that. Don't pretend to ignore that, or you'll ignore and lose that forever, Misato.

About Horaki Hikari

To the class leader, Hikari. You're a nice girl. I don't know so much about you, but I think you're a good person. I know you're feeling to Suzuhara. I couldn't give you any advice to you about that…..What I know is, do what you think is the best. Just do the first thing that you think is the best thing you could do at the moment. Don't let another situation affect what you've decided, be a strong girl. Be brave to tell Suzuhara the truth. The truth in your heart……That's what I could say to you.

About Akagi Ritsuko

I know you think I'm the other competitors to get Gendou. But believe me, this is for your best, we both will never get him. Even he looks kind and has showed the symptoms that he likes ywith you, but his heart is still locked from the outside. In his heart, the only word you could find is 'Yui'. And, looking to the fact, that I know surely you could feel that too, Yui still wants him and her son, Shinji. Sometime it feels that when you inject the injection to my body, you think that if you don't have to, then you won't do that; keep saving my live with the medicine. Ritsuko, when the time is right, you'll find out something. Until that day, what I could say for you is 'don't be cageg by your past. What happened to your mom isn't sure will happen to you…..'

About Suzuhara Toji

I saw many people that caged by their past. I hope you're not one of them. We rarely talk, almost never. What I know is, you agreed to be an eva pilot because you wanted your sister to be moved to NERV hospital, which better than the place before. I saw you have much love to share, Toji…..But, eva 5 didn't want to accept you. It rejected you and made you were injured. I don't know why. May be that woman didn't like you. She didn't like me too. That's why I always get a low result for synchronizing test. Toji, even if in the end you can't be the eva pilot, but you've tried hard. Don't be sorry about that. I'm sure that your sister will thank you very much for your effort. I like the way you survive from this cruel life.

About Ryoji Kaji

Kaji, someone special for Misato. I heard rumors about your betrayal to NERV. Just need to count, how long will you survive, until Gendou realizes and slaughter you. You're so kind to us. Even if I rarely talk to you, but you're still look at me as an ordinary girl, not as a robot like someone new usually does. Now, do your best, as a NERV staff, and as the government spy. You get much important information here. Well, I can't blame you at all. At least your arrival to NERV had brought us some good effects. You make two NERV girls madly in love with you. What a charming aura…. I don't know about your past. Good luck in your jobs

About Ikari Gendou

He is the savior of my life. Thanks for all our one hundred percent kindness to me. But, even if I have a feeling to you, I know surely your heart still belongs to Yui. People see you're showed interest to me….I don't ignore that. You're so kind to me. And that kindness invites jealousy from some people. Asuka wanted your attention to her because she thinks she is much better than me. And the golden kid for you is supposed to be her, not me. But, she doesn't know the history behind this. Behind our life, our dark background that I don't want to open that. Our painful past…..the awful moments…..But, I do understand about Asuka. She is still young, still hasn't discovered the whole world. And the other is Yui. May be you don't know my sufferance in eva (read 'The heart of Ayanami'). Yui still wants and needs you. That woman, I couldn't beat her. That one who has your heart. The heart absolutely belongs to her. Even if I know, you're still thinking about her all day long, from day to night, as long as your rest of your life….I still hope….still hope that may be someday, you'll be able to look at me clearly….really look at me…for a minute, just for a minute really love me….Not haunted by the shadows of Yui, the shadows of your past……..

About Ikari Yui

I'm not your enemy, Yui. I know you're not happy to accept me in your masterpiece, Evangelion. I never blame you because of that. I know the feeling if someone that you love be with another girl. What I mean with another girl here is my self. Sometimes it feels that I'm just a parasite. I know I'm regarded as a disturber by you. But, what you have to know is, deep inside his heart, there are only you. I can't enter his heart, because his heart door is locked and sealed by one name, Yui. I even don't have the bravery to knock that door, and just wait until he forgets about you, even that I know that's impossible to happen. Yui, I can't compete with you. About that, I'm absolutely a looser in front of you. I envy you. I'm weak and powerless. But about one thing…..I'm not just a reflection of you. I exist in this world too. Even that I know, some of the reasons is because of you. I'm Ayanami Rei. I have my own identity, I'm not you. I'm different from you, Yui. I'm not a doll as people think, and once again, I'm not your reflection. I am who I am. Yui, I know I'll never make a fantastic score in synchronize test. But, thank you for your incorporation to me. And I hope you'll understand that I pilot eva for some good reasons…..I will do my best with your masterpiece. And I will watch over your hubby and son. I think whole my life is related with one name, Ikari…..


End file.
